Beyond the Clouds
by TwistedNY
Summary: What would the Volturi do if the Twilight Series was fact, not fiction? What would Edward do if he killed a human? The world is not as safe as you think it is and things really do go bump in the night. Post-Breaking Dawn. Edward POV to start.
1. Chapter 1 Mistakes Happen

**The characters of Twilight are the property of Stephanie Meyers.**

The morning air was crisp and fresh. It had snowed last night leaving the air cool and cleaner than it had been in a long time. I hated pollution and the way it made the air smell like chemicals. I could still always find prey, but on some days, the air would be so bitter, it would be difficult to keep my focus on food. Even way out here, miles from the nearest town, it could be really irritating, but I knew I had to feed so I was pleasantly surprised by the now clean smelling air and hoping to find prey before the pollution reasserted its hold.

It had been a long time since I fed so I wanted to make sure I was farther away from civilization than normal. I was standing alone in a dark circle of old fir trees just waiting for the scent of my prey to lead me. Bella had taken Renesmee and Jacob hunting further south, but I wanted to hunt alone today. Although I could only hear Bella's thoughts when she let me, sometimes I needed to get away from everyone else's thoughts for some peace and quiet. Even in our cottage away from the house, I could still hear my family's thoughts. Alice's thoughts had become stranger and stranger. I was getting kind of worried and needed time away to think about them without Bella scrutinizing my features.

Alice had been having visions of our past, which was really unusual because she usually only saw the future. But the visions were of us, Alice, me, Bella, Jazz, Jacob, but not of us. It was so confusing. It was sort of me, but not me, and it was Bella, but not Bella, and the story was all mixed up and there were crowds of people around and cameras. I couldn't figure out the images and the crowds. I was never one for large crowds and even though I learned to control my thirst, human blood would always be a temptation. Now that Bella's blood wasn't eclipsing the blood of all other humans, I was back to keeping a distance and ignoring the pangs of hunger that hit when I was close to classmates or co-workers. I stopped visiting Carlyle at the hospital because it had been too much to bear the last time I was there. I couldn't seem to get the same control back I had before Bella, and now Alice was seeing me surrounded by crowds and crowds of teenagers? It was really worrying.

I spoke to Alice about it this morning before deciding it was time to hunt. She looked drained and, if it was possible, pale. Her brows were furrowed with worry and frustration.

"What's wrong Alice? Where are these images coming from?" I asked aloud because she looked too distracted for us to have a silent conversation.

"I don't know Edward," she whispered desperately, "I've never seen the past before and this past is different but the same. I can't place my finger on it. I keep concentrating on us, but they don't seem like us, they seem human."

She was thinking her gift was making her crazy and that she had been in the asylum when she was human because she deserved to be there. She was thinking maybe she had dreamed us all up and was actually still in that dark room, dreaming.

"You're not dreaming Alice; you're just over working your gift." I explained in as sure a voice as I could muster. I honestly didn't understand her visions either and was hoping she had more insight. The look on her face was less than satisfied with my explanation.

"I'm going to try to get a clearer picture. Jazz went hunting with Emmet this morning." She said distractedly, "You guys should go hunting too Edward but not too far, ok? There's something not right." She trailed off, furrowing her brow again and gracefully jumped out the window on to the nearest red wood and started climbing up.

There had to be a better explanation and out here, far from everything and every person, I knew I'd be able to figure it out.

A small breeze wafted in front of my nose and I took off running. It was a bear. I could tell, and it was at least 10 miles away, but I was glad for the opportunity to run, really run, through the newly cleaned air. When I got close, I braced my muscles to be ready to change direction and give chase, but the animal did not run. It was a really large grizzly with long claws and large canines and it smelled a little … rancid, but over the years many animals had started to smell differently, probably due to all the pollution.

The bear was standing rubbing its back against a large fir tree and I stopped. Something was wrong. Most animals instinctively fled when they sensed our presence. In fact, I liked chasing them down and conquering them. It felt good to be able to use all my power even if I did it because the need for blood was overpowering me.

I approached him from behind the tree silently. He continued his back scratching until I was only feet away from him. He stopped, paused and fell forward on to his paws so he could turn and face me. I got a chill up my already ice cold spine and narrowed my eyes. What kind of deranged animal is this? Where was his fear, his survival instincts? His blood smelled warm and strong as it coursed through his veins. His green/brown eyes showed no fear, only anticipation. As adrenaline hit his system, his blood coursed feverishly through his veins, but he made no movement to turn and run. I was so thirsty that I didn't think to wonder why, so I leapt at him.

My body lunged through the air at top speed meeting with my target in a blink of an eye. The animal swatted at me and clawed, but I felt nothing but the urge to feed. I instinctively lowered my head to his neck and bit, sucking the blood from the great bear. I drank and drank and was full but there was more blood, so I kept drinking for what seemed like forever. It tasted so good and different. Almost like…but it couldn't be, almost … I froze with my mouth still sucking the life from this body. The body went limp and I lowered it from my grasp.

It wasn't a bear at all. There on the ground, underneath my opened hands and heaving chest was the body of a large man. He looked to be in his late thirties, well built with dark brown hair and a long brown beard. His blood surged through me as I gulped in air. I may not need to breath, but the feelings of shame that took me caused my body to react in an oddly human fashion. I could feel some blood trickling down my chin and I licked at it hungrily with my tongue then tried to spit it out. My knees fell to the ground and I lifted my fists to the sky in rage as the blood coursed through my veins and made me feel full and satisfied and strong while my conscience wanted to thrash out from the inside and leave me broken and alone. Rage and despair consumed me and I let out a scream of agony going back all the way to 1918 and the night Carlyle changed me. The blood made me feel so alive and so dead, even more than that night decades ago.

I let my fists fall to my lap and turned my head down to stare at them. They looked like human hands. The fingers were long and graceful, and the skin was pale and marble like, but they were human hands. I opened my shirt, letting the buttons fly out. My chest looked human, albeit muscular and well toned and impossibly pale, but human. I breathed and it heaved up and down like a human. My legs were strong and muscular with the normal amount of hair human men have on their legs and, aside from being really fucking pale, I looked like a god damn fucking human. Even my face and head had bone structure, eyes, eyelashes, lips, teeth, fucking teeth. Fury built in me overpowering my usually calm façade. I killed this innocent man, a human, because, while I looked human, I was not. Maybe that's why he didn't run? Maybe that's why he just stared at me. He wasn't even scared … because I looked human. He, however, looked like a bear didn't he? Didn't he look like a bear?

Bella's voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Edward where are you?" I heard Bella's voice in my head. She had lowered her defenses to let me in and she was close. She had probably heard my scream, but I couldn't let her find me here, with my eyes red and blazing, a dead man at my feet. I ran. I ran away from Bella and my "human" heart, both of which I no longer deserved.

It had been a long time since I'd killed a human when I had left Carlyle to fashion my own brand of moral vampire. It was the mid-thirties and I was trailing a man who was a really sick monster. His thoughts were so bent and twisted as he remembered the faces of his victims. He enjoyed their screams and the look of horror on their faces. You'd never know, just looking at him, what kind of monster lay beneath. He lived a "normal" life, had a job and a family and all the things that go along with that. It was all a mask for the monster within that he let out on unsuspecting women and young girls. I was disgusted with a world that could allow him to live among humans while it pushed me to the fringe of existence and made me hide and skulk in alleys and darkness. Then again, I felt almost super-human and was content to be the one to stop him, the gift of my transformation was the power to fight filthy monsters like him.

Carlyle didn't understand when I told him I wanted to use this curse to help mankind. Maybe we could regain our souls by protecting the innocent and culling the world of its evil. Carlyle never thought we'd lost our souls. As a doctor, he reasoned, he was already protecting the innocent. Only he thought all humans were innocent. I had the unpleasant advantage of knowing their thoughts, and I knew not all humans were innocent.

I remember trailing the monster, his name was Jonathan Blake. He was relishing, no salivating, at the thoughts of his newest victim to be. She was the daughter of a neighbor and he had seen her skipping down the street earlier that day. He wanted her and was planning on stealing her from her room that night to satisfy his hunger. I was hungry now. I was tired of waiting for the killers to be so close to the victims. Tired of waiting to be sure they were really going to go through with their thoughts. I had given too many monsters the benefit of the doubt. I was tired of waiting to be discovered by someone I saved so they could scream in disgust and terror at me, their savior.

I hitched up the collar of my trench coat, thankful that it was raining and my clothes wouldn't look out of place. I followed silently behind him, letting the scent of his blood fill my mind. I was salivating and the idea of feeding on him made me euphoric. When he turned down the alley, I was so fixated on my mission that I didn't pause to listen to the surrounding area. I just let my hunger pull me into the alley, and I pounced. His blood was thick and warm and I pictured his victims as I fed. It tasted so much better when I knew I was giving him what he deserved. Even though he was screaming like a child, I was sure I could shut him up if I kept drinking, but the screaming didn't stop. I felt him go limp in my arms and released him, now dead, unable to hurt anyone else. I looked up, my eyes turning red filling with the blood that would color them for the next week or so, into the eyes of a child, twisted in despair and pain, tears running down his small cheeks as he cried.

He ran to the monster at my feet, his tears mixing with the few drops of blood I let fall to the ground. I was stunned and confused. The child ran to the monster and cried over his dead body. This dead man that was a monster and a terror to women and young girls; this dead monster who planned on taking a life that very night, had a child who grieved for him. He had a wife who would wear black at his funeral. He had family who would sit in silence every year on this day to mark his death, and he had this child who would grow up remembering me as the monster who killed him.

Now, decades later, that small child long gone from this earth, I had killed again. I was a monster then and I am a monster now. I had been too arrogant then, thinking I was just to punish their crimes. I had been too arrogant now, thinking I could live among humans and just control myself, deny myself my monstrous desires.

I just kept running, running away from my life, from my family, my existence. I knew that they loved me, but I couldn't face them. I couldn't face Carlyle. He'd always been so proud and supportive. I knew he'd forgive me. Then there was Bella and Renesmee. I felt so much love for Bella and Renesmee, and even Jacob, when he wasn't an asshole. How could I let them see me like this? Would they recognize me or would I look like a monster to them too? I could just hear my daughter asking my wife why daddy's eyes are blood red. Why didn't I notice that the man in the woods was not a bear? Was it really a mistake, or did I just give in? I stopped then. No words, no thoughts came from the man. What was that I saw in its eyes before I pounced?

Without warning, I doubled over in pain. My whole body erupted in acute searing pain, like thousands of tiny knives cutting from within. I fell to the ground. I clenched my jaw and pulled my knees to my chest trying to ride out the pain without calling out. If I did, Bella would hear me and come. Tiny knives reached my spine and I felt a pain unlike even that of being changed. It was excruciating and I knew if I didn't scream, I would explode from within. I held back the scream and internalized it deafening my inner ear with a silent scream. I was sprawled on the ground, my body jerking with spasms and my mind concentrating on keeping my screams silent. I didn't even hear them coming.

Out of no where, I was being picked up and carried. For a fleeting moment I thought it might be Bella and Renesmee, but the roughness with which I was hoisted and carried like a rag doll made me think Jacob. Renesmee wouldn't let him treat me that way. The pain, now centered in my head, interfered with my mind reading ability. I could hear nothing and couldn't move or open my eyes. If it hadn't been for the excruciating pain, I would've been sleeping for the first time in almost a hundred years.

The pain was so persistent that after a while I almost got used to it and could open my eyes. I chanced a look at the ground. I don't know how long I had been catatonic, but the shadows on the ground told me it was night. We were still in the forest, the ground looked cold and dark and there was light, from somewhere and everywhere. It must've been the moon. We must be far from Forks. Forks was under a never ending cloud bank, and it was hard to see the sun, let alone the moon. Even when the moon was full, the clouds would dull her light.

The air was cleaner up here too and I sniffed the surroundings to see if I could deduce where we were. In fact, after drinking human blood, all of my senses should've been even more sensitive than on the usual diet of bear, mountain lion or elk. Pushing back the pain, I inhaled through my nose deeply. Wet grass, dirt, animal droppings, elk sweat, birds, rocks, vampires, two, I was sure, then… rancid animal? I inhaled again trying to concentrate on the rancid animal scent. It was so similar to the bear, the man, to my victim. It was close, but there was no rushing of the blood, no adrenaline, no fear. Strange, but I couldn't verify anything with this damn pain.

I inhaled again, yes, two vampires. One was male, carrying me, one female. I let my eyes open again, slowly, painfully turning my head, small feet danced gracefully on the ground next to the vampire carrying me. Maryjanes on little, graceful feet… Jane. I closed my eyes again. That explains the pain. What was she doing here? I let out a low growl.

"I think he's coming out of it." said Jane in her sweet high voice. "Shall I incapacitate him again?" She asked hopefully, and by way of demonstration she looked at me momentarily and I reared back writhing in pain again. The intensity of the pain increased exponentially. I was shocked at the magnitude and control of her powers. If I hadn't been in so much pain, I might be impressed.

I clenched my teeth as the pain passed and growled again.

"If you call off your pet, I'll walk." I said through my still clenched teeth. Being a vampire had its perks in the pain department. For the most part, you didn't feel any, so having Jane regale me with her talent for the past several hours was really too much. In almost a hundred years, I'd been largely free of physical pain. I hadn't really missed it.

"Now, now Jane, control yourself. Caius wants him lucid." It was Demetri's smooth catlike voice. Of course, it would have to be Demetri. No one could run or hide from Demetri, not when he was on his game, and I hadn't even seen him coming. "Besides, I don't think he'll try to get away, not with his family somewhere out there, within our grasp."

At the mention of Bella and Renesmee, a low, furious growl erupted from deep within me. Instantly, almost as quick as it began, I was silenced by another bout of pain from Jane as Demetri unceremoniously dropped me on the cold damp ground. The pain was severe, but not as bad as before. I knew Jane was holding out, using just enough to quiet me.

"Don't be stupid Edward," spat Demetri, "you always struck me as so smart. Caius is waiting for us and he wants us to be there before sun up, so we better hurry."

I stood and slowly felt all the pain subside. At least vampires heal quickly. I started to take a few steps and stumbled clumsily. This was unusual, to say the least. Although my body felt better, my mind was, what is that sensation … dizzy? In a hundred years, I hadn't been dizzy or clumsy and now I could barely walk without stumbling.

"Ah, don't worry about that Edward, just residual effects of my latest serum. I perfected it just for this moment; the moment when I captured Edward Cullen." He smiled, obviously pleased with himself. "I have been working on it for decades, ever since I found out about you and Alice from Eleazar. I knew it would come in handy."

I had figured that Eleazar had informed the Volturi of our "gifts." Marcus seemed too intrigued by Alice and I when we first met in Italy. Demetri was thinking of too many things at once, no doubt in an attempt to keep me from reading his mind, but my mind was still dizzy, and I couldn't concentrate enough to get a clear reading. Jane's thoughts were easier to hear. She wanted to cause more pain and was picturing Bella on the ground writhing in pain. I growled and started toward her again and promptly stumbled to my knees. I shouldn't have been worried, Bella was immune to them all, but what if Eleazar had a "serum" for that too?

Demetri caught my arm and held firmly. "Shall we go back to carrying you? I'd really rather not. You don't want to show Caius you're weak. Aro really wants you dead, but Marcus is on the fence. Always wanting to add to his collection you know." He whispered this, his face so close to my ear I could smell the blood of his last victim. "You'd seem so easy to dispatch if I carry you to Caius. If you walk in, you have a small chance of survival. Maybe he'll agree with Marcus and give you yet another chance." He said in a bored tone and smiled deviously.

Demetri had always been one for drama. He and Jane made a good team.

I stood again and breathed in the cool night air. My head was clearing slowly. Demetri pushed me and we continued walking up the mountain under the full moon and bright stars. My blood red eyes were seeing clearer than they had in a long time, my ears were hearing better than ever and my nose was picking up even the faintest scents. With the blood of a human coursing through my body, I felt more powerful than I had in decades, and I felt farther removed from humanity than I had since before I met Bella.


	2. Chapter 2 Silent Witnesses

**The characters of Twilight are the property of Stephanie Meyers. This chapter is a little shorter than the previous one, but I had to set certain things up and if I kept going, it would be twice the size of chapter 1, so I broke it up. Chapter 3 will be posted next week, latest.**

Just thinking of Bella made me realize I had to get back to her. As we walked, my thoughts turned to Demetri and Jane and getting away. If for no other reason than to run to Bella and tell her what I did. I dreaded the thought of just disappearing and never seeing her again, breaking my promise, but I also dreaded the look I would no doubt get when she saw my eyes and realized what I did. Her opinion, her love, her acceptance was the only thing that mattered and disappearing and never seeing her again was simply not an option.

Then again, I didn't want her looking for me either. I was sure that Alice had seen what happened by now. She had probably already told Bella and they were probably already looking for me. This thought made me wonder why Alice hadn't seen Demetri and Jane coming. Last time the Volturi 'visited,' she had seen them coming the minute they decided to take the trip. Now, Demetri and Jane made it all the way to the wilderness around Washington and Alice didn't see a thing.

My attention went the large dark figure behind Jane. He was so dark that even with my ultra-sensitive eyes, he looked only like a shadow, a humongous shadow. He was larger than Emmet or Jacob, who astoundingly had grown another few inches. His skin was pale but covered in heaps of jet black hair. The hair on top of his head was the same jet black color and hung down in long wavy strands. It partially obscured his young face. Even with his thick beard, he looked no older than Jacob. His eyes were sallow and drawn. He looked in a trance and he smelled… rancid. I recognized the smell immediately. It was the same smell coming from my last meal, my first victim in decades.

Jane noticed my stare and said with a pout, "How rude Demetri, we didn't introduce Boris." She smiled sweetly and grabbed Boris by the hand. Her hand disappeared in his huge palm, but he followed her pull without her needing to exert any effort. "Boris, this is Edward Cullen, he has wolf friends."

She turned to me, "Edward, this is Boris of the Nivkhs tribe in Siberia. He smells terrible, but we find him useful for various purposes. We keep several around us now-a-days."

I could feel the heat radiating from his body. As far as I could see, the only difference between Boris and Jacob was the hair. I noticed that he walked with a slight limp. His thoughts were a jumble of images, mostly a small village, snow, his family, a wife and a son. He was missing them terribly but felt tied to the Volturi.

Jane was looking at me thinking about how the Volturi had enslaved several members of this tribe. They had attacked the villages at night and, with the combined force of Jane and Alec, had taken the shape shifters as slaves. They kept them physically weak by feeding on them periodically and punishing insolence by hurting their families. Jane loved to punish the wives and children; it was always her pleasure to dominate the weak. A renewed hate coursed through my body. They meant to try the same thing with me.

The Volturi were good. Somehow, they knew about Alice's weakness and, even more astoundingly, they found another tribe of shape shifters... the Nivkhs. This explained why Alice didn't warn us about Demetri and Jane's arrival or any recent plans of the Volturi.

It did not explain my inability to discern between a bear and a man looking like a bear. Even as a wolf, I could hear Jacob and his brother's thoughts.

I could read Boris' thoughts. Right now, he was thinking how he'd like to take a huge bite out of Jane. I chuckled bitterly at the image as I'd have liked to do that too. I could read his mind. I should've been able to read the other poor man's mind, but he was blank, as blank as staring at Bella with her guard up.

"It took us a long time to find the right bait for you." said Demetri as if he was reading my mind. "Although the serum is effective no matter how old or powerful a vampire you are, the delivery must be through human blood and you Cullens" he spat out our name as if it was a curse, "are so picky about every little thing you eat."

Demetri stopped talking when we reached the flat top of a large mountain. Mount Rainier was visible close by and I could make out Mt. St. Helens in the distance. Their snow capped tops shimmered in the moonlight. The forest and surrounding mountains majestically encircled us as if giving their own witness to our meeting. We were standing on top of a volcano long since burnt out. Long ago it must've exploded, losing its head leaving only this barren stage-like arena. I looked out at least 500 yards and didn't see its end. Standing dead center were Caius, Alex and another large Nivkh.

"Welcome Edward, we've been expecting you," said Caius with an approving glance toward Demetri. He hadn't thought I would go for the 'bait' and was impressed with Demetri's ever increasing tracking skills.

"We've broken no laws Caius; you have no reason to be here." I said calmly, knowing he thought we had let others find out about us. "I don't understand who you mean by 'others.'"

"I mean the writer, the director, the actors, the whole damn human race…" said Caius incredulously. Anger seethed within him. He thought of all the people skulking around his Volterra looking for Volturi. You know you told them the whole story so don't even try to deny it, he thought knowing I would hear.

"We've told no one. The only person was Bella and, as you know, she is now one of us. Even Bella's father is clueless"

"Well, pretty boy, it looks like you don't know everything then doesn't it?" said Caius tossing me a book and a magazine.

The book had a plain black cover with two hands holding a bright red apple. The title was 'Twilight Never Ends.' The magazine was some cheap rag. It had pictures of various people with pale faces and colored contacts. They looked eerily like me and my family. The headline was 'The Vampire Family of Forks.' I leafed through its pages and saw the article referenced a movie based on the 'Twilight Never Ends' book.

"What does this have to do with us?" I asked. This human trash had been around for decades and most vampires ignored it. Only occasionally did one fall in love with one of the actors or actresses and then it was a big deal. James Dean was the last vampire crush, what a disaster that was. Since then, it had been agreed that we would avoid the famous ones.

"Read" demanded Caius pointing at the book.

I started reading, and, as the pages flew past, I became more and more disturbed. How could someone have known all these details? How did they know about me and my family and Bella, and… As I finished the book, I let it fall to the ground. The Volturi were here for me, Bella, Renesmee … all of us. This was the proof positive, in black and white, that they needed to hang us all.

A slow rage started to burn inside me. There was so much fighting, so much pain. I had fought for years to make Bella happy, knowing that I didn't deserve her, that I didn't deserve to love anyone. I had fought my hunger, fought my instincts. Now, after I was finally beginning to believe Carlyle might be right, that maybe we can be happy, maybe we didn't lose our souls, fate throws this in our face. It was proof positive that we were not meant to be. It was proof that no matter what, fate would not let us lie. A human had told our story… to the world. A human had sealed our fate with the flip of pen, and now the world had seen our story made into a movie.

I had never been one for movies. Music was my only passion after Bella and Renesmee, and movies never held much fascination for me. Sometimes a soundtrack would get my attention, but I never really cared for the underlying story. Oh, it was great to see the technology advance, just like on cars, but once you get over the techno aspect, the stories were usually told and re-told, just using more color, more special effects, and more money. Humans were a different story. Humans around the world loved movies. They had never been more popular. Millions of people went to the movies every weekend, and the Volturi were scared. All vampires were.

"You have one option and not much time, so think quickly," said Caius. "You must dispatch the humans responsible. You must do this before any more films are made or attention is garnered. The movie from this book was very popular. There are three more books, and intelligence tells us the author is working on another. He must be stopped. The movies must be shut down. You must do this. Alone."

"No, I will not hurt any more humans." How could he even think I would intentionally hurt anyone? Not withstanding earlier that day, I would never willingly kill a human. I wouldn't be able to live with Bella or any of my family if I were to murder countless innocent people.

Caius smiled, "I thought you might say that, and I've really no skill for reason or patience. You will come, now, back to Volterra with us. Aro and Marcus will, hmm, explain the rest. In the mean time, don't be foolish. Consider this young lion, with Boris and my friend, Vasily, here" Caius patted the large Nivkh by his side, "your family won't even see us coming."

At that moment, a helicopter came into view by Mount Rainier. It had its lights off and was approaching us at top speed. I knew immediately it was another Volturi guard, maybe Felix.

I clenched my teeth and seethed. A quick calculation told me I had no choice… yet. Caius was right. I would have to go to Volterra. Somehow, I would find a way back to Bella and Renesmee and the rest of my family. Somehow, I would find a way to save them, from everyone.

As the helicopter got closer, I made one last futile effort, "Caius, it's one movie, it may have been popular, but you know humans, they will automatically think it is all fake. Then something else will come along and grab their attention." It seemed so elementary to me, humans were so fickle and this generation was jaded and over stimulated. I saw a horror movie once, 'The Ring.' It scared me! The rest of the audience was not impressed. It was like they had seen it all before. I even saw this one kid; he was actually eating while people were getting killed by the dripping wet aberration of nature. If I wasn't a vampire with super human strength and immortality, I'd have been terrified of that kid.

"NO!" shouted Caius. "We thought like you… at first, but since the books were released we've had people visiting Volterra every year looking for us, so don't tell me they'll think it's fake. Now, with the release of the first movie, we've had more and more… visitors. They're cramping out style and, just like bugs will eventually find their way into a house, the humans will eventually find one of us. The rest of the movies will just make matters worse. You will come quietly now. You will speak with Aro and Marcus, and…, in the end… you will dispatch the humans or we will be forced to dispatch ALL of the Cullens."

The helicopter landed. I walked towards it, past Caius and Vasily, past Alec. I took one look around again at the mountains and forest, the moon and the stars, my witnesses. Without looking back again, I boarded the helicopter, closely followed by Demetri, Jane and the rest. We took off towards Italy, and I searched my mind for a way out, or a way to warn my family. Boris and I looked at each other. The pain in his eyes reflected my own. Even if I couldn't read his mind, his was the pain of not being able to protect those he loved, he was broken. I was getting there.


	3. Chapter 3 Undone

**The characters of Twilight are the property of Stephanie Meyers. Sorry about the delay in posting. This was a tough chapter to write and I wanted to get it right. I hope you enjoy it.**

I stared out the window of the helicopter and tried to think. We were flying to Calgary to catch the Volturi's private jet to Italy, ostentatious, as usual, but necessary given their numbers. The clear, star lit night of our mountain top heli-pad disappeared as we rejoined the Forks cloud bank. My red eyes could see so far, it was amazing, and that's saying a lot because even my ordinary 'vegetarian' eyes could see for miles and pick up the tiniest details. My ears were hyper-sensitive too and the constant beating of the helicopter blades became a melody pounding memories into my head. It reminded me of the night Bella, Jacob and I had spent on the mountain, when Victoria had been our biggest enemy. I could picture Jacob and Bella in the sleeping bag together. Their heart beats, his fast, hers steady, pounded out a furious beat. The melody in my head was steady and hopeful, while the harmony brought pain and anguish. It had been so painful, that night, to be unable to warm her, unable to be that close to her. I had made a silent vow never to be in that position again. Now that we could be together and feel each other's 'warmth' fate turned against us again.

A bitter sneer crossed my face at the thought of it all. My life before I was Edward Cullen had been short, but I didn't think it was sad or tragic. I had lived like any human at the time, day by day. The only certainty was death. Once I was changed, that existence became a distance memory, like my last dream, my last sleep. Indeed, I would never dream again, I thought bitterly. My soul, did I lose it? Was there still hope to save it? Did it really matter? I mean, no sleep, no dream, and no death. What does salvation matter when your immortal?

Silence wasn't something I was used to. When you can read people's minds, there is rarely silence, especially when you live among humans. Most of the time it's insane gibberish, unimportant details pertaining to one person's view of themselves and what they should or should not do. I was used to that crap and could usually block it from disturbing my own thoughts. Vampires, on the other hand, didn't do a lot of excess thinking. Besides the usual, like feeding, avoiding humans and sex, vampires had fairly interesting thoughts. My current company was no exception.

Caius, arguably the least interesting of the Volturi coven, had the most intense thoughts. His thoughts about me and my family were no exception. He viewed us as a danger, an aberration. We shouldn't exist, in his mind, because we were, ironically enough, shirking what he considered God's will. We were, to him, lost souls denying our destiny and rightful place in the world. He took it as a personal affront that Alice and I did not want to be part of the Volturi and that Carlyle had, long ago, not been persuaded by their arguments on lifestyle.

We were monsters to him. The only reason I wasn't burning right now was his brothers' orders and his love of his wife, Athenodora. He had loved her for hundreds of years and his love knew no boundaries or time limits. It was endless. He was endless. He had watched Marcus deal with the death of Didyme and had vowed never to let that happen to any of his coven, guard or followers. Of course, this didn't stop him from using this information against other vampires and their mates. It was his preferred means of persuasion because he understood its draw.

I thought of Rosalie and Emmett, Jasper and Alice, Carlyle and Esme, and Bella. I would not let them hurt my family, but how could I be part of my family if I did what they wanted? Renesmee had just started reading poetry and loved, Do Not Go Gentle into that Good Night by Dylan Thomas. She loved the struggle between life and death, a struggle that would not, or should not, be hers. I thought about her. I would rage against the dying of the light for her, I would do what I could to get back to her and my wife.

I kept my eyes trained on Caius and avoided looking at the Nivkhs. I didn't want to acknowledge their pain or admit I could be broken too. Caius was breakable. I could break Caius, I thought to myself with satisfaction.

"Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight," I muttered bits of the poem to myself absently, "Old age should rave and burn at close of day."

"Are you going to start chanting poetry to us now Edward?" mocked Demetri, "or are you preparing your soul for death?" He smiled like a cat that cornered an injured mouse. His thoughts were so typical. He was hungry for another hunt. He wanted me to say no so he could go off on another Cullen hunt. His mind relished the thought of just choosing which one of us to go after first. He'd definitely keep Bella and Renesmee for last because he thought of them as the weakest, but also the sweetest. Venom collected in my mouth and I clenched my jaw to keep from lunging at the conceited wretch. He was more evil than I'd given him credit for, maybe Jane was rubbing off on him.

Calgary airport was nearly deserted when the helicopter touched down. We landed on the tarmac and walked through the damp early morning to the private jet. It was colder here than it had been in Forks and there seemed to be a huge storm rolling in. The few lights on in the terminal looked like emergency lights and the ground crew was thinking about getting rid of these creepy rich Italians and going home. They weren't sure what Caius and the rest of us were, but they were scared enough not to block our takeoff and getting paid enough not to discuss our arrival or departure.

The jet had seats enough for about forty and all the windows were black to filter the light. The Nivkhs sat in the middle row, one on either side, probably to spread their Alice blocking ability. I tried to sit in the way back, as far from them as possible, but Jane took my hand and led me to a seat near the front. She smiled at me innocently as she led me away from my chosen seat.

"Come sit with me dear Edward. We never get the chance to spend quality time together, and I so miss your visits." Her small hand looked so fragile, but the strength in them belied even me. She was older than I and her long diet of human blood kept her deceptively strong, even though she never needed her physical strength.

I said nothing, taking my assigned seat and turning away. Sweet, innocent, beautiful and completely deadly, even the Volturi were a scared of Jane's power and often gave her what she wanted. They knew of a weakness, however, and she was weary of them too. In the end though, she liked being part of the 'family' and abhorred the way nomadic vampires lived.

The flight was long and the tension I felt made it longer. Living for a hundred years with no end in sight doesn't make minutes pass any quicker when you're waiting for something. The minutes it took for me to find Bella at the dance studio; the hours we waited on the mountain for Victoria to attack; the days we waited for the Volturi — every second was a lifetime of anticipation. The only difference now was my direction. Instead of being with Bella or going to her, I was going away, leaving her without a trace.

Volterra was almost a welcome site. I was ready to end this, one way or another, right now. We had landed at Fiumicino airport outside Rome and took two shiny black Hummers to Volterra. As we climbed the mountain towards the wall of the city, I could see the city was crowded, even for tourist season. As I stared at the approaching gate, the Hummers made a sharp right off the main path down an old road that looked more like a hiking trail. The Hummers had no trouble navigating the rocky terrain, after all that's what they were built for, and at the speed we were travelling, it was mere moments before the gate was a distant memory, lost in the red smoke wafting up behind the powerful engines.

"We don't use the main entrance anymore young one. We can't. There are hundreds of tourists about looking not at the beautiful churches or ancient architecture. Thanks to your family, they're looking for us," said Caius coldly.

We circled around to the far side of the city, opposite the gate. Instead of traveling closer to the wall and going through a 'secret' entrance, we travelled down almost to the foot of the mountain. Here, amongst umbrella pines and cypress trees was an opening in the mountain. From afar, it looked like nothing more than a crevice in the side of the mountain. We barreled toward it. Once in the cave, the trail dropped sharply and wound around in a seemingly endless passage of ups and downs, rights and lefts. If I could've been sick to my stomach, I think the whole Hummer would've been ruined. Given our power and grace while running, it seemed counterintuitive to travel by car, but the final turn brought us into a large garage with at least fifty cars ranging from a Model-T to an Astin Martin. I saw an old Volkswagon Beetle right next to a brand new Camero. Had my family and I not been in mortal peril, I might've been tempted to tool around the garage for a spell, but the thought of Bella and the rest of my family made me want to blow the garage up and watch every car burn. I smiled at the image of the flames and destruction.

We walked to the far side of the garage and through a door into the now familiar industrial hallway and headed down to the elevator. Gianna was not at her usual post, which was unusual given the occasion. She always seemed to be present for all the interrogations I'd ever heard of, and her wish to be welcomed in as a vampire was so strong, it seemed like she'd never leave.

"She's dead, Edward," said Jane nonchalantly. "She was our first suspect when the humans started their incessant searching. It's a shame we didn't find out about the books first, she was a great employee and, now we can't trust anyone new. We've had a few subs, but," she stared at Demetri, "they all fell … flat." She smiled sinisterly and Demetri chuckled.

Aro and Marcus were in the center of the large round room where Bella, Alice and I had met with them. Although fewer Volturi were around, other Volturi guards were present. A few clapped as I entered followed by Caius, Jane and Demetri. Alec had taken Boris and Vasily somewhere and I could see they were replaced by two other Nivkhs. Their constant presence was disconcerting. I was both relieved and frightened. Relieved that at least Alice wouldn't be able to tell Bella where I was and frightened because, if things went wrong, my family would have no warning of the Volturi's approach. I hadn't realized it at the time, but Alice had saved us on many occasions and we relied on her sight, maybe too much.

Aro put up his hand and sneered at the applause. Silence immediately fell on the room.

"So glad you could join us Edward. It's a pity this isn't a social call," said Aro pleasantly with an heir of superiority.

"Let's cut the formalities Aro, I know what you're thinking and it won't be that easy. If I do what you say, I can never go back to my family. You've already decided what you'd do in the alternative, but I can't let you kill my family. You know that too." I said as calmly as possible with my fists and jaw clenched. Aro admired my ability to control my emotions, but it was getting more and more difficult and was nearly impossible with the human blood coursing through me.

"Nonsense Edward, we only want you to embrace what you are. If you just realized, as we do, that our purpose is to cull the human population, then you wouldn't be in any danger and we could all co-exist peacefully. You know the rules, but someone in your clan broke the rules. We are giving you a chance to save your family and avoid punishment. We are giving you a chance we wouldn't give other covens. Think of it as deer season. The humans hunt deer to keep their population down, to protect them from themselves." His eyes blazed with his pride. He was enjoying looking into my red eyes. He knew how my body was feeling with the renewed strength human blood give us.

"I'm going to disappoint you Aro, if Alice was here, she'd show you that."

"She's not here, though, is she Edward? She has no idea we were even in Forks. Isn't that right?" He smiled again at the truth of his statement. He had read the books. One of the later books goes into how Alice cannot see the future around shape shifters. Until now, they hadn't been sure if it was all shape shifters or just Quileute. My presence here just confirmed that it might be all shape shifters.

"Just kill him already." spat Marcus with disdain, "He's a waste, just like the rest of the Cullen clan." He could never get past the intensity of my relationship with Bella, and, now that we were both vampires, it was even stronger. This bothered him more than our chosen lifestyle. We reminded him of Didyme and the love they once shared.

"Patience brother, we can't take care of this problem without risking exposure." _You must do this Edward_, thought Aro looking at me. _Think Edward, the humans will die anyway, but one sacrifice by you will save your whole clan_. He reached out gently and took my hand. I instantly tried to amend my thoughts, but what was I hiding now? We had no secret weapon, no knowledge or edge. The books had done their damage in that respect. I really wanted to find out who wrote them and how they knew so much about us.

Aro's smile grew and he motioned with his hand toward a tall redheaded vampire I'd never seen before. Her hair was as red as her eyes and her skin was clear and porcelain. She was slim, but powerfully built with ample breasts, which were excentuated by her tight black leather outfit. She wore impossibly high heels but walked so gracefully she didn't seem to even touch the ground. Even for a vampire, she was graceful and stuck out as different, special. I was astonished that I hadn't noticed her the moment I entered the room.

"Shannon, this is Edward. Say hello."

"Hello Edward, it's so nice to finally meet you. Aro has told me so much about you, I feel like we already know each other." She smiled a dazzling smile and her voice was like the most pristine crystal and snow. I shook my head to free it from these thoughts. I saw Shannon and Bella side by side and ached for Bella to smile like that.

_You want to join me for a hunt don't you?_ She hadn't spoken, but I heard her thoughts, which shouldn't have been surprising, only it wasn't like hearing someone else's thoughts. Normally I hear them like a conversation of pictures and words, but this was more like one of my own thoughts.

_Wasn't that human delicious? You want more don't you?_ Again, it was like it was my own thought.

I grabbed my hair and brushed it out of my eyes, then ran my fingers through my bangs a few times. I shook my head a few times trying to clear the thoughts, I closed my eyes tightly.

Aro was thinking it was funny. Shannon had powers too. Of course, why would there be a new vampire if she didn't have powers? He was avoiding thinking about what her power was and most of the other Volturi didn't know what her power was. I could only imagine it had something to do with mental suggestions.

"Shannon, maybe you could take Edward to meet our … friend." instructed Aro.

Shannon smiled at me and, despite my love for Bella; I felt an overwhelming urge to go with her, to touch her, anywhere.

She put out her hand and without thinking my hand found hers. Her skin was soft and smooth and her grip was strong but non-threatening. I felt comfortable and at ease. We walked out of the room and down the ornate hallway to a small steel door. It was thick and heavy and locked. She turned toward me and smirked as she nudged it open with ease. Again she smiled. So … beautiful. So… beguiling. So, so, what the hell was I thinking?

I wrenched my hand out of hers and shook my head again.

"What are you doing to me?" I asked trying to fight the urge to touch her again or to pound my head through the think stone walls. "Where are we going?"

"Edward, my dear, dear, Edward," she sang each word slowly, letting it roll off her lips, enticing, her tongue flicking in and out. "I just wanted to introduce you to our guest." She smiled again, her lips parting slightly. Her bright white teeth glowed against her plump, moist red lips.

Without thinking, I took her hand again and continued to walk. I tried to stop breathing so I could fight whatever power she was using, but all the while all I could think about was her lips and teeth and tongue.

We walked down an old tunnel made of ancient rocks. It was dark and damp like most of the outer hallways, but this one smelled like … ambrosia. A torch hanging on the wall told me why. The walls were dripping with fresh human blood. It was a mixture of many different humans, but each one smelled … delicious. It must've been blood from their last kills.

As we neared the end of the hallway, I heard it. A heart beat. I could smell the blood pumping through him. The pumping grew louder and the heart beats sped up at our approach.

Shannon stopped at a small wooden door at the end of the hall. I could tell this was where the human was. He was scared and bleeding and the smell of his blood was … amazing. Despite his thoughts of his home and family, I wanted to taste his blood; to bath in it, to let it fill me.

"I can't," I fought the urge to tear the door off its hinges. "I don't kill humans, I am not a monster." I shouted it at the top of my lungs, shaking the ground we stood on, growling with rage and frustration. Shannon flinched back momentarily from the power in my voice then recovered with a toss of her hair. She inhaled deeply letting her breasts rise and fall in her tight top.

"We were created by God, just as humans were; it's just that our purpose is different. We are not monsters Edward, we're hunters." She stared at me intently.

_You know it's true, humans are mortal; you are not. Without blood you will continue to exist, humans will find you and Bella and kill you without asking what you'd like to eat._

"I have no right to take a life; I have no right to end that man's life. He's done nothing to me and I am not God. I was human once. I should've died human. I am an abomination, a monster and I make up for it by protecting humans and eating only animals. It is my atonement." I practically chanted all the reasons Carlyle had given me long before.

_Where is your sleep, your chance to dream? Why should you worry about salvation when you'll never see that goodnight? You needn't rage against the dying of the light, you're what they write about when they speak of the dying of the light. You are a necessary part of their existence. You think the earth would've lasted this long if we had not been here to slow the human's growth?_

"You know it's true," whispered Shannon into my ear as I braced myself against the wall outside the human's cell. My fists felt the blood smeared on the wall, I turned my face away from the temptation. "Humans are violent and destructive. We are their only true mortal enemy. You know how nature works, humans eat the animals, we eat the humans, humans hunt us keeping our numbers low… it is the circle of life. We would be monsters if we disturbed the balance."

Her words made sense as my head swam with the scent of the human's blood and thoughts of Bella were replaced by the urge to feed.

_The man inside this cell is a monster. He's editing the second movie about you and your family. He helped the humans expose us, endangering your family, your Renesmee, your Bella… If he didn't exist, maybe you'd be with Bella right now and we'd all be safe._

"You're immortal; you are here to rule over humans, not cower under them, hiding what you truly are. Start, Edward, start being what you were meant to be, kill the human inside this room and claim your destiny. Save your family." Shannon's voice was commanding, but still low and seductive.

I leaned my head back, staring at the blood soaked ceiling and bared my teeth. With a low, long growl, I pushed open the door and entered.


	4. Chapter 4 No Return

** All characters featured in the Twilight series are the property of Stephenie Meyer. This chapter is a little graphic, but it was fun to write…**

I crouched in the corner staring at a smear of blood on my palm. My crimson eyes looked straight through my hand to the floor below and the crumpled remains of Stewart Edgewater, assistant film editor from Duluth, Minnesota.

He had had no idea what was happening. I tore through his prison door like a tornado tears through a tree house, and stopped just inside the cell. I let him squirm. I watched as he scrambled up from his cot, a trickle of blood ran down from a gash on his forehead, probably the result of a flying piece of door, and pooled by the rim of his dark framed glasses.

At first, he stood, knees bent, hands at the ready, as if he was going to try to fight. He was a short, round man, prematurely aged by a shrinking hairline and a penchant for liquor, cigarettes and fast women. Although he was only half way through his twenties, he was thinking about dying and how his mother had been worried when he said he was going to Italy to work on a movie about vampires and how his father thought working in movies was for gays and Jews and that he'd never be a real man if he hung out with actors. Well, he thought, this was pretty manly, right? He was actually a little smug that he was about to fight a real vampire for his life.

He had been reviewing the day's footage for A New Moon Rises when he was seduced by Heidi into coming to Volterra. The woman was so hot and it had been a long time since, well, with all the actors around, even ugly girls were ignoring him. He hadn't read any of the books, but he knew they were originally supposed to shoot in Volterra, so he thought it would be good for his career if he at least got laid there. This was his first big production; his first step to the big time, and he was doing what he could to impress the people with the power. He was even kissing the actors' asses, which he hated because he thought they were all stupid and spoiled.

Now, he thought, here he was, locked in a dungeon in Italy staring at the epitome of Edward Cullen. A knowing expression crossed his face, and he relaxed a little.

"Oh, it's you," he said with some relief, "is this because I spiked your Twinkies or because I spit in your Starbucks?" he asked with relief.

I didn't answer. I just continued to stare at him. I was still weighing all my options, trying to decide if I needed to do this.

"I gotta tell you, you guys really go all out to teach a guy a lesson…" He shuffled nervously and looked from me to Shannon, who had entered silently behind me, "I mean, I will never leave the footage unattended again, but," he pointed knowingly at me, "you had to see this chick…"

When I continued to stare, his voice cracked and he started sweating. The sweat made the blood from his gash run faster. It smelled so fresh and inviting. "You, your jus...just playing with me, right?" he whispered, his voice rising about 2 octaves as he spoke. I licked my lips, and he laughed nervously.

I barely heard him. The smell of the blood was distracting and Shannon's words were in my head – _claim your destiny, save your family. _His thoughts were random and scattered. He was so selfish, so… human. It was all about him, his career, his sex life, his family, blah … blah … blah… He actually thought I was an actor, in the movie he was working on; that I was the actor playing Edward Cullen. It was comical. I chuckled and stepped closer to him. He must've sensed something was off because he started slowly backing away. I took another step towards my pray, not moving my eyes from his. There was nowhere for him to go. I had him trapped. I merely had to reach out to end him, but I didn't pounce. Something inside me wanted this moment to last, this anticipation – it was such a rush to smell the fear waft off his body.

As I moved towards him and he backed away, my face was caught in the light streaming through the cell's one small window. I could see Stewart's eyes widen with horror as he noticed my diamond flecked skin and scarlet eyes. There was no denying that I was not the Edward Cullen he had hoped I was. My lips curled in to a smile of satisfaction. He was one obstacle between me and an eternity with Bella. He was helping the process that endangered my family and my existence. He was going to be one less thing to worry about.

"Stewart, you pansy piece of shit," I hissed as I used his father's words against him; "you shouldn't have gotten involved in movies about vampires. You should've stayed at the factory in Duluth." His eyes widened with surprise at my knowledge of his life. I spoke slowly, in a whisper, but my voice was firm and unwavering. "Now, you're in the way, and I must remove you from the equation for the good of my family. Maybe your father will finally respect you and, well, you'd probably die of a venereal disease in a decade or two anyway alone in a dirty apartment above the strip."

I can't explain what made me say these things to him. I could read his mind. I knew his pain, and I knew how to hurt him and I did. I could've just killed him, but that slow burning rage inside me wanted him to hurt. I wanted him to suffer before he died. I wanted him to be in as much pain as I was. I was doing this for my family, but I would never be able to be with them again. I would never be able to face them when they found out what I did. I couldn't explain how there was no other choice, and the realization of this made me furious beyond comprehension. My eyes burned into Stewart's face, a new trickle of blood rolled down his forehead.

Without any more hesitation, I sprang at him in a blink of his eye and sank my teeth into the crook of his neck. He screamed and struggled against my steal grip. In the fray, I pulled off his arm and blood sprayed the walls. It didn't matter; I was getting my fill and felt his life draining away. With every ounce of blood, I felt stronger, more determined, ready to do what needed to be done to get make Bella safe.

Stewart's body went limp, and I let if fall to the ground. Although his blood coursed through me invigorating my whole body, thinking of Bella made me sad. I crouched to the floor and stared at my blood stained hands and my latest kill.

I was deep in thought and barely noticed Shannon's slender, leather clad legs in front of me. She reached down and gently took my bloodied hands into hers. She knelt in front of me and stared into my eyes. I stared back without really seeing her. Slowly she lowered her head, her eyes never leaving mine, and licked the blood from my palms.

_Kiss me Edward; kiss me like you kiss Bella._

She licked my palms again and let her tongue trail up my fingers gently. A tingling sensation coursed down my arms and through my body. I shuddered reflexively. Her tongue was warm, and her touched was light but firm. Seductive. Instinctively, I cupped her chin in my hands and started to pull her towards me.

"No," I said suddenly realizing what was happening, and pulled my hands away from her. I stood up and looked down at her, my body still tingling from her touch. "I love Bella, and even if she never takes me back for what I've done, I will never love another."

_Sex isn't always just about love, Edward. Sometimes it's just about need._

She was doing it again, putting thoughts into my head; making me believe they were my thoughts. I grabbed my bangs and swiped them out of my face. The human's blood boiled inside me, making every sensation, every sense ultra acute. My whole body tingled with desire and my hands ached to touch. There was a need rising in me, but now was not the time for more giving in.

"Get out of my head Shannon."

Shannon stood and stared into my eyes. She stepped closer to me and I could smell her hair and rose scented perform. She smiled wryly and brought her lips to my ear.

"Bodies, Edward, even vampire bodies, need contact," she whispered softly and ran her hand gently up my arm, "I just wanted to be there for you while you can't be with the one you want. It's not wrong to do what is natural. It's not wrong to satisfy your needs."

I closed my eyes and turned my face away from her. My body was reacting to her touch without my permission, and I tried to think of calculus equations, baseball stats, Symphony variations, Bach Inventions, anything but sex. I tried not to think of Bella or Brazil or Emmet and Rosalie because all of these things reminded me of sex.

_Remember your needs. If you neglect your needs, you might not be able to handle your assignment. You might be too distracted and get caught or you might be sloppy. _

She leaned towards my neck and blew softly from my shoulder to my ear. I kept my face turned away and shut my eyes tightly. I stopped breathing so her perfume couldn't affect me anymore, but my body had already made up its mind.

She leaned in to place her lips at the crook of my neck. My hand shot up and grabbed her by her throat. Her hands went to her throat and she tried to escape my grasp. Her eyes were wide, but not shocked or even scared. I pushed her against the far wall of the cell and held her against it. Her porcelain skin sparkled in the sunlight that streamed through the small window and hit the wall where I held her. Her breasts heaved as she took in a breath to say something.

I tightened my grasp of her neck but couldn't bring myself to throw her away. My loins screamed for to touch her body, to taste her lips, to take her.

I was struggling between my body and my mind. This would be wrong. This would feel right. The blood coursing through my body made it stronger, more reactive, and less controllable than on my normal diet. I was becoming a savage, with savage tastes, and uncontrollable desires.

I leaned closer to her and surveyed every inch of her face. She was indisputably beautiful. Her features were delicate, but sharp and her eyes were large and round, like Bella's were, only hers were red due to diet, not the change. I tried to picture her eyes amber, like Bella's had been as the months wore by and her human blood was expelled and replaced with that of deer and antelope. Only Shannon's eyes shown without the innocence of Bella, they were experienced, knowing, wanting. The hunger in her eyes was undeniable.

_Of course I want you Edward; you are the ultimate vampire, a vampire with a conscious, who struggles with his desires. You are so much more than the others._

"Take me," she choked underneath my grip, "I don't care why you do it, and I just want to please you."

I released her neck and she dropped elegantly to the floor but immediately stood and stared into my eyes. She thought about other men and other vampires she had met and their desires and how she had come to the Volturi when she realized her powers. She had been a vampire only five years longer than Bella and she could still remember her life before.

She remembered leaving her house because her drunken mother's newest boyfriend wouldn't stop hitting on her. She remembered the fat, smelly man she shacked up with because she couldn't scrape up any cash for a place to stay. Mostly, she remembered Laurent, the sophisticated vampire who offered her the world for her services but never fell in love with her. She was transformed by Laurent, and he stood at her side, but he had only been concerned with a warm body and an occasional fuck. In the end, he left her when he tired of her "mind games." He was going to try to kill her but, somehow, couldn't bring himself to hurt her. Instead, he joined Victoria and James and left her in the City of Angels. To survive, she channeled her street smart human and seduced unsuspecting old men to their deaths. It was effortless. She enjoyed the power she had over men and used her body and her mind powers to her advantage. Then one day she ran in to Victoria. She had spoken of the Cullen clan and how James was dead. It had chilled her to think of one of us dying, but it also made her hopeful. Maybe Laurent would come back. Maybe he would realize he loved her. When Victoria told her Laurent had fallen for Irina, Shannon was devastated and hibernated in an attic for about eighteen months. Then she took off for Italy. She had, much like Edward, wanted them to kill her, but when she got there, they welcomed her with open arms and asked her to join them. Finally, here, among the Volturi, she felt the love an acceptance she had always desired. It wasn't physical, it was mental… until now she had forgotten about physical.

She devoured me with her eyes. Every cell in her body screamed for my touch and, when she pouted her deep red lips, I couldn't resist.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her towards me roughly. My eyes searched her face, her hair, her body… I pushed her against the wall again with my body and crushed my lips to hers. I pushed open her mouth with my tongue and plunged it deep into her mouth. She responded with her own tongue, expertly pushing against mine in an endlessly seductive struggle.

My hands roamed all over her body. With the tight leather outfit she had on, it was almost like touching her flesh. My hands found the hook clasps of her leather top and I started unhitching them one by one. As they came undone, her milky white skin was free to bounced and react to my touch. Once I had her top undone, I ripped open the top and tore it away in shreds. Her breasts were round and firm and smelled like peaches as I nuzzled them with my lips and nose. I lifted her up so her breasts were on level with my eyes. I wanted to devour her every crevasse.

She caressed my hair and licked my neck. She nibbled my jaw bone and kissed me passionately. Her hands roamed over my chest, back and stomach. Soon, they found the waist of my jeans and she expertly unzipped them and slid her hands into my underwear. I shuddered at her touch and felt my growing anticipation expand to her hands. I pushed her back against the wall again and licked the soft peaks of her breasts. I tried to hold her hands at her sides, keeping them from my manhood, but she was wiry and fast. Roughly, I pulled her from the wall and brought her down to the floor.

Afterwards, we lay on the ground covered in the splattered blood of Stewart Edgewater. She licked some of the blood from my arm, my chest, my thigh. I likewise like the blood from her neck, her ankle, her butt. I felt calm and satisfied for the first time since I killed the Nivkhs several days ago.

Bella was another world away, a distant hope in my current reality. I longed to see her, to touch her, but I knew that was hopeless and knowing she was safe from harm was all that mattered.

I thought about all that had changed in the past few days. I had now killed two humans and cheated on my wife. Was I losing my identity or just protecting my family? Would I ever see Bella again?

I looked at Shannon while she licked her way from my navel to my nipple. She was replete with lusty satisfaction. Her eyes had darkened over the night and were now cranberry in color. They extenuated her dark red lips, so full with desire and promise.

I pushed her away and started to get dressed. I needed to get back to Aro and the rest. I needed to get this mission over with, to do what I had to so I could get back to my family and deal with their rejection like an adult. I always knew I'd go back, no matter who saw the red in my eyes or my blood stained hands. I could never stay away from Esme, Alice or Bella. They, along with Renesmee, were my life force. They, to sound cliché, completed me.

Shannon looked up at me from our place on the floor.

"Are you leaving so soon?" She asked seductively

"I have to… I have to … go see Aro, and I have to … get the details… so I can get this all over with and… and go home." I stammered.

Shannon lowered her eyes to the floor, "oh, yeah, yeah, that's what… that's what you need to do… I'll go … take a shower and…. And pack for the trip." She stood and picked up her torn leather outfit. She slung the garments over her shoulder and sauntered out without trying to cover up her nakedness.

I finished dressing and walked out to the hallway and back toward the main chambers. As I walked, I noticed the air by the cell had been cleaner. The closer I got to the main chamber, the more I smelled the Nivkhs. It was if Stewart's cell had been far away from any Nivkhs.

Far away, just outside Forks, Washington, a short haired brunette sped down the stairs of her luxury house in the woods. She turned right and entered the large dining room where her family sat. The stared up expectantly.

"It's Edward," said Alice, "I've… I've… found… him."


	5. Chapter 5

** All characters featured in the Twilight series are the property of Stephenie Meyer. Sorry for the delay in posting – school work was beckoning and even though the draw to write this was strong, impending tuition loan repayments won out in the end. We're back in Forks to catch up with the rest of the family. I'll go back to Edward in a few chapters, but I wanted to show this angle too …**

"It's Edward," said Alice, "I've… I've… found… him." Her eyes were wide and surprised, almost as if she didn't believe what she was saying. She scanned the table and her eyes found Jasper. There they remained, communicating with him as only she can.

I just stared at Alice in disbelief. Had it been hours, days, weeks? How long had I been without my love? I thought about the day he disappeared. It felt likes years had passed.

- -

I knew I heard him. We couldn't have been more than 10 miles from him and then… nothing. Jacob and Renesmee were circling about a mile from me as I concentrated on letting Edward hear my thoughts. He was well tuned to me by now, and, when I concentrated on lowering my defenses, he could hear me from more than 10 miles away, so he should've heard me.

I knew something had been bothering him. He seemed distracted and worried, and when he said he wanted to hunt alone, I became concerned. He was so intense and focused usually that I never expected him to need "alone" time. It was so… so human. Wasn't that my thing?

It seemed almost like he was having difficulty concentrating, especially around Alice. I realized she had looked worried too, and I wondered what they were hiding from me, again! I vowed to speak with both of them when we returned from hunting.

I'm not a child, just because I'm decades younger, didn't mean they had right to hide things from me. As Edward's wife, I just wished he'd be more open with me and stop always trying to protect me and keep me safe. It annoyed me, I mean now that I was a vampire too and couldn't be killed… easily, I felt just as capable as any of my family to partake of the serious stuff. Shit, I though condescension died with the human me.

I would've sat them down the minute I decided to confront them, but the look in Edward's eyes when he said he wanted to hunt alone told me to wait until he'd fed. His eyes had been so dark and cloudy. It was a look I'd only seen once before. He looked lost and determined, like he'd looked when he was preparing to walk into the sunlight. I was scared and felt helpless to help him. He wasn't communicating. It was almost unreal to me how we could be these 'super human' beings and still have the same damn problems my parents had.

Then I heard his scream. I was positive, to the depths of my being, it was my love's scream, and now we couldn't find him. After we heard the scream, Jacob, Renesmee and I took off running. I threw my shield away and called out to him. He didn't respond. I kept my shield down as we ran towards the sound. It was such a strange sensation to be so open – like even my vampire strength and speed wouldn't protect me. I felt vulnerable, but I didn't care, I needed to be available to Edward. He would've done to same for me, in a heartbeat. With some help from Jacob's ultra-keen sense of smell, we caught Edward's scent and followed it to a small clearing in the woods. A large fir tree stood majestically over the broken, crumpled body of a man.

He was a large, heavily built man with long brown hair, a long brown beard and pale, luminescent skin. He wasn't wearing any clothing, which is odd at any time of year, but especially when winter was around the corner. The marks on his body showed a violent death. His body was crumpled in an unnatural position, like it had been broken in two, and there was a deep gapping wound around his neck and collar bone. No scraps of clothing littered the ground, no pieces of cloth stuck on a branch or bush as if he'd been running. There was blood on the ground, but not nearly enough. A man this size would've left a pool of blood large enough for Renesmee to swim in, but there was barely a trickle. Aside from the wound on his neck, and a few scratches here and there, his skin was unbroken.

Instantly, I felt a chill run up my spine, which is weird considering Vampires are naturally ice cold, but I guess everything's relative and some things never change. I knew something was wrong; had Edward gotten into a fight with another vampire? There didn't seem to be any evidence of a 'vampire versus vampire' struggle, no trees pulled out of the ground, cracks in the earth or shattered rocks, and there was no unfamiliar vampire scent. Maybe the man was killed by an animal. Edward would've chased after the animal when he couldn't save the man. He would be so upset. Edward hated to fail at anything, and if he tried to save this man and couldn't, he would be nearly inconsolable, but that didn't explain the blood.

There was a distinct bear smell. It was definitely bear, but it was also a little rancid, like a bear that had eaten aluminum. There were also animal hair and bear footprints around the dead man. He was covered in the smell. Still, his body didn't look ravaged, where were the claw scratches. Bite marks were there, but they were small for a bear. Jacob pointed out that he had larger jaws when he was a wolf and most bears he ran in to were his size or slightly larger.

"He's probably too weak to kill it," said Jacob, smirking. "He probably needs Nessie to help him, that's why he screamed." He nudged my shoulder in an attempt to lighten the mood. I turned and scowled at him.

I knew he was just trying to make me laugh, but I just didn't think this was an animal attack, and neither did Jacob.

"Jacob…" I started in a slightly irritated, slightly exhausted tone.

"Yeah, I know, sorry. Look, he can take care of himself. He's been around longer than all of us added together. I can't believe I'm saying this, but give the guy some credit. No matter what happened here, Edward would get help if he needed it. You know, as well as I do, he wouldn't leave you or Nessie," reassured Jacob.

He was right, of course, but my uneasiness did not go away.

It was getting dark and Nessie needed to go to bed soon anyway. I contemplated leaving her with Jacob while I continued to follow Edward's scent, but since he was so much faster than me, he'd probably make it home before I could catch up with him. I decided to go home with my daughter and take care of her. Jacob was right. Edward could take care of himself. He didn't need me to protect him. Besides, if anything did happen, Alice would see it and we'd be able to help him out.

--

Jacob and Renesmee had fallen asleep in the cottage hours ago and Edward was still not home. Vampires don't get tired. I thought I might miss sleep when I became a vampire, but, with Edward, there always seemed to be something to pass the time. Now, as I sat here, watching over my daughter and my good friend, I was tired. I was tired with worry, tired of not understanding everything that went on, tired of secrets.

The main house was only seconds away and since I knew Carlisle, Esme and the rest weren't sleeping, I decided to run up there for some comfort and maybe a little insight from Alice. She may be keeping something from me with Edward, but she was still one of my best friends. First things first. Find Edward. THEN kill them both.

The lights were on in only two of the rooms when I got there. This was unusual, because usually everyone spent time in different parts of the house doing their own thing. When I entered the house, they were all sitting at the dining room table looking concerned.

"Bella," Carlisle rose from the table as I approached and came towards me. "How have you been? Where's Edward?"

"What? I thought… didn't Alice tell you?" I looked at Alice in disbelief. She had always been highly tuned to Edward. It was this special bond between them that saved his life in Volterra.

"Bella," started Alice, but Jasper put his arm around her and pulled her down. He whispered in her ear and she closed her eyes.

"You mean Edward is not back? Alice told us he 'disappeared' but we all assumed it was just because he was with Jacob." Carlisle looked from me to Alice and Esme.

I stared at Alice willing for her to tell me Edward was alright, that he was on his way, that he had just gone really far to fight the 'thing' that killed that man, that he… was… coming home. As I stared at her, I noticed she looked worn and drained. Her usual luster was faded. She was normally so spritely, like a fairy more than a vampire, but now she looked pensive and drawn, like she was mourning. She stared down at her lap as Jasper stroked her back and whispered in her ear.

Jasper caught me staring at Alice and said, "Bella, please come sit and relax a moment." I sighed and took a seat next to Emmett, it was just impossible to not be at least a little calm when Jasper was around.

"Good," said Carlisle in apparent relief, "Bella, we were just gathering to talk about some family issues, so it's great you showed up when you did, although we are distressed that Edward is not here, I'm sure he's not far off." Carlisle looked again at Alice then took his seat at the head of the table. "Alice, please continue with what you were going to tell us." He motioned to Alice, who finally lifted her gaze from her lap and longingly looked around that table at each of us.

"I think I'm going insane," she said quietly, with remorse and turmoil. "I don't remember my human life, but I know I was in an asylum and had shock treatments. Maybe I wasn't there just because of my visions, maybe there really is something wrong with my mind…" He voice broke and again Jasper whispered into her ear. She looked into his eyes longingly, took a deep breath and continued.

"My visions are going haywire. I see Bella and Edward when they were in high school. I see teenagers and cameras. I see James and Victoria and Laurent. It's like all of a sudden, all I can see is the past. I tried to stop the images, but they just kept coming back. I'd even see myself, Jasper, everyone, in the past. Then, this morning, I had a vision of Jasper catching a large elk when we hunted. Then Jasper caught a large elk. I thought, maybe I was cured.

The visions came back again. Past visions, everything slightly different, slightly changed, even us, we're slightly different in my visions – like an alternate universe or something. So I went up in the trees to clear my head and try to focus." She stopped for a moment and he eyes found mine and quivered like, if she could, she'd be crying.

"I concentrated on Edward and saw him hunting alone in the woods today. Then he disappeared, then he reappeared, but his eyes were red and he was looking around him like a maniac. He ran so fast and then he was gone again." Her mouth stayed open, agape still at what she had seen. "It was horrifying. It was insane."

Silence filled the room and suffocated me. I almost choked at the idea of Edward with red eyes and I looked at Alice with pity. She must be going insane and there, again, was nothing I could do to help her. This must've been what she and Edward were whispering about. He must've seen these visions in her head and been worried. I bet if he'd seen that last vision it would've spooked him too. He could've told me, but what could I do anyway?

Carlisle was the first to break the invisible sound barrier we'd been sitting in, "I don't think you're going insane Alice. We don't understand the powers you, Bella, Renesmee and Edward have. We don't know why you have them or how they change over time. This could be a natural progression of your gift. Maybe … it's just a new aspect to your visions…" He looked around the table to help. I'd never seen Carlisle completely perplexed and he'd seemed to be on to something, but then… plop.

"I think he's got a point Alice," said Esme patting Carlisle's hand, "you even told me years ago that your visions were getting stronger every decade. This is probably some sort of progression that we don't understand yet. You should've told us sooner," she said in a motherly tone, "you shouldn't have had to bear this burden alone."

"Yeah, sis," piped in Emmett, who looked pretty freaked out, "you're probably just dreaming of going back in time and fighting for me, the catch of the century." Rosalie elbowed him in the ribs and gave him the, you're in the shit house look.

"Don't listen to the moron," said Rosalie whipping him another look of disdain, "your visions have always been strange and uncontrollable. This is the same thing. You should've told me though. I would've liked to be there for you." She looked honestly hurt. "I bet if you just relaxed for a while, you'd figure out what's going on. I can help you relax, we can go shopping, drive fast, go shopping, pick on Emmett, go shopping…"

Alice chanced a smile at us all, but her eyes said she wasn't nearly done with being upset. We were just a temporary distraction.

"I know Edward would've known what to say," I told her gently, "you know he's been mulling this over probably almost as long as you have. He might've even been amused at your latest vision. When he gets back, you should tell him." My voice wavered a little while I spoke, I couldn't get rid of the nagging feeling that Edward was not coming home tonight.

"Hey, can we do something? Like all of us? Lets play a game or something," Emmett never liked drama and always wanted everyone to be happy. His idea of playing a board game was normally met with "nahs" and "yeah rights," but tonight, it seemed like the thing to do, vampire style.

Vampires don't do one thing at a time. It takes so little of their many resources to just do one thing, so, unless it's food or sex, they need multiple stimuli. Therefore, we played Pictionary, Twister, Risk and Life simultaneously while Jasper called out trivia questions randomly for bonus points. It would've seemed like mayhem to any human, but it was a nice distraction for the moment and Alice and I even found ourselves laughing along with everyone else, especially when Emmet, Jasper and Rosalie all attacked Carlisle and Esme's countries while trying to move their feet over each other for the last red spot and trying to guess what Rosalie was drawing with a pencil in her teeth.

Too soon, the sun was coming up. Edward! He was probably home by now, watching over Renesmee, but even as I thought it, I knew it wasn't the case. He would've come up to the house. He would've joined me in the game. He wouldn't be home when I got there. He wasn't.

--

Time passed. No Edward.

Alice became more sullen as time passed. He visions were still in the past and the frustration she was feeling was clear. Her eyes grew dark as time wore on, but she refused to hunt. Jasper had to force her to hunt with him, which was probably the first time I'd ever seen them even disagree.

I was no different. If it hadn't been for Renesmee, I would've been searching the woods all the way to Russia if I had to. I went out each night to search with Emmett and Rosalie searching for any sign of Edward. An all too familiar hole in my chest grew exponentially.

The only other time I'd been without Edward for more than a night or two was when he'd left me "for my own good." This hole was worse because I didn't know where he was. No one, not even Alice, knew where he was. Last time he'd been gone, when I saw Alice, I instantly felt closer to him because I knew she knew where he was. Now, she was in the dark and I was losing hope.

How long had it been since I'd seen my love? I remember being distant, being mad at him. That seemed so far off now. When I went to the house to get Emmett and Rosalie for our nightly search, Carlisle called me into the dining room. Everyone was already seated except of course Alice who was up a tree somewhere still trying to find him.

"We need to expand the search," said Carlisle. "We need to go to Alaska, Europe, South America; we need to ask our friends for help. If he's alive, he's not in the woods around Forks. That's more than obvious at this point."

"Right," said Emmett, "Rosie, Bella and I've been through every inch of the forest, even as far as Mt. Rainer, he's not out there." He turned his head towards me, "Sorry babe, I know you feel better when we search, but you know it's true. He's not out there."

"What's the plan?" I asked, resolved to be involved in the search and not left behind to mind things here. I needed to be out there doing something.

"You should stay here with Renesmee…" began Esme, but I interrupted before she could finish.

"I'm not a god damn child anymore, I'm a wife and a mother and I'm going to get my husband back. I want. No, I need to be involved in this."

Esme was about to reply to me when Alice walked slowly into the room with a shocked look on her face.

"It's Edward," said Alice, "I've… I've… found… him." She looked at Jasper. He got up and went to her and put his arms around her lovingly. "That's not all," she said flatly, like she was in shock, "I … I saw him killing someone."


End file.
